FAIRFAX, Va. — As millions come together and spend time with their family to celebrate Thanksgiving, there are some people who struggle to get through the day.
A lot of grieving families who have an empty seat at the table this Thanksgiving are having a tough time. Now, a Virginia mother who turned her grief into passion to help others.
Grief comes in waves, and on a day like Thanksgiving, it’s tough to maintain.
“It’s hard,” mother Debbie Zane said.
When you look around Fairfax Memorial Park Cemetery - you’ll notice those who are taking breaks to spend time here with their loved ones. One of them is Debbie Zane — who has been embracing this latest wave of emotions.
“It’s a time when their absence is more pronounced,” Debbie Zane said. “Especially because everyone is getting together on the holidays."
This January will be three years since her 26-year-old son Alex Loomis died. She says he dealt with both drug addiction and mental illness.
“Every Thanksgiving, in the morning I come, and I visit my son Alex,” Zane said. “It’s sad but it’s also connection and an opportunity, a quiet opportunity to take time for my own grief.”
Zane remembered what it was like to celebrate the holiday with her son.
“He loved Thanksgiving, he loved to eat,” Zane said. “After losing him, I felt really called to help other parents.”
In May 2023 she decided to write to help her deal with the pain she was going through but then that turned into a book "Finding Peace and Purpose Amidst the Tears."
“To help others who are on a similar journey to help them not feel alone, to give them hope for peace and healing and the inspiration to go on,” Zane said.
She offers advice to those who also have an empty seat at the table during the holidays.
“Before you celebrate with everybody else, take time for yourself and your grief and emotions and just allow that space and I realized by coming here that’s what I do for myself,” Zane said.
As she’s adapted to this latest wave of finding balance, she became a certified grief coach to take her purpose another step further.
“It’s just really important to me to help others in this way. It helps me, it brings meaning to my life and helps me connect with Alex,” Zane said.
Click here to learn more about the book Zane published to help others.