Yolanda Hadid isn't holding anything back.
ET's Keltie Knight recently spoke with the former Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star in New York City, where she opened up about her various health issues, "heartbreaking" divorce from David Foster and whether she's ready to find love again.
"I am much better than I've been in six years," said Hadid, whose new book, Believe Me: My Battle With the Invisible Disability of Lyme Disease, hits shelves everywhere on Tuesday. "But I live a very conscience life. I still do IVs three days a week. I am on a very religious, holistic program… and a very strict diet, I just need to pace myself."
When Hadid first signed on to RHOBH in 2012, she had no idea she had Lyme disease. In fact, she's still unsure of exactly how long she's actually been battling the bacterial illness. Additionally, she was diagnosed with the Epstein-Barr virus when she was 13 years old, which was followed by bouts with hepatitis.
"I was forced to pace myself and I also need to say, 'No,'" she explained. "I say 'no' every day to many, many things. I just have to continue to do that in order to not stress myself out and take a plunge."
"Having no brain function is the hardest because I'm such a communicator," she added. "Not having words to speak, that's probably the worst of all of it. But also not having the ability to exercise. I was such a sporty person my whole life and all of a sudden I haven't exercised in five years. Losing your hair, the exhaustion, the joint pain. There are just so many symptoms that we fight and battle every day."
In the book, Hadid admits there were often times where she felt suicidal after being diagnosed with Lyme.
"I am such a lover of life, so to even get to a point of my life to have such a thought is crazy, but it can happen to anybody," she shared with ET. "It could happen to me. And the reason I shared [that info] was because that's my story and I'm not embarrassed about it. This is my truth and I feel that the only way I can help others understand what they are going through was for me to say, 'Hey, I had those thoughts.'"
"There is no cure for Lyme disease," she continued. "So, you fight this monster every day, seven days a week, year in, year out. You just become helpless and hopeless and I think that those are the moments that you feel so sick and you do so much. Like, I'm a good soldier. I religiously did my protocols and wasn't feeling better."
Hadid was married to Foster for seven years before they announced they were divorcing in December 2015. (It was finalized in May of this year.) While chatting with ET, Hadid revealed that her illness did play a part in their split.
"Of course it was heartbreaking. It's my marriage -- it's heartbreaking, but so is life. David and I had a great seven-year run. It became very difficult," she explained. "The only reason I shared [that story] is because people need to understand that being a sick person is really hard, but being the caretaker of a chronically ill person is hard and people just get to their limit."
"Men want to fix things and if they can't fix it, it's really hard," she continued. "And absolutely from my part, no bad intent, we all say things that we don't mean. We all say when we get pushed to the end, we all say things that are hurtful, but it's not a big deal. I hold that marriage and that relationship in very high regards."
"I only wish him love and heal and happiness and I've grown from it," she added. "I'm so grateful to be where I am today and if it hadn't been for that, I wouldn't be in New York today and I wouldn't be living the life that is authentic and true to me."
And when asked if she thinks she will find love again, Hadid was hopeful.
"Oh, absolutely. I am such a romantic," she gushed. "I've taken two years to really heal and to really learn to be on my own and be happy. I'm at that place now. I'm ready to fall in love."
"Just, like, a normal guy, you know?" she added. "Not somebody in the industry -- just somebody loving, spiritual."
